say something, I'm giving up on you.
Sunday, October 25, 2015 Posted In Denmark , Holiday , homesick , lonely Edit This
Hyggelig is a Danish word which describes the feeling of being warm, content, unhurried, at peace. It sounds kind of like "huggeley" and in my head that's what it means... The feeling of security and warmth you get when someone you love who also loves you encompasses you in a proper hug for no reason at all.
I think that's what I long for. I think that's what this interminable homesickness and longing and restlessness and dissatisfaction is all about. That warm feeling.
I feel incapable of finding it myself. Substances don't even help. SSRIs make me not give two shits about anything- good or bad. Hash makes me some combination of paranoid about all my worries and insecurities or incredibly sleepy. Booze makes me warm and happy for a while and then I keep talking and talking and I realise how much I hate myself and how much everyone else probably/should hate me and then I'm a sobbing mess.
Lately I just want to beg people to fix me. Please fix me. Please make everything better. Please give me clarity and warmth. Please make everything hyggelig.
Gøre mig hyggelig.
